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Femme Like That

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i'm femme like [16 Mar 2010|06:49am]

good in the kitchen, better in bed, could shop for days,especially for shoes
i'm femme like  i love you written in lipstick on the bathroom mirror
in wine with everything and cherries in the snow
i'm femme like i love my dewalt
and laying down brick
i'm femme like sweat is lovely and devoted to you
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what could you ima?gine for your union [15 Mar 2010|02:41pm]

something rich and complex yet secure
 a place where you can be wild free yet safe
honor your partners complexity
yet be as  true to your own desires however innocent, or sluttish they might be ?

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Be Aggressive. B.E. Aggressive! [05 Mar 2010|12:58am]

[ mood | pensive ]

I am currently in the midst of watching the documentary The Aggressives on Netflix (if you have an account you can watch it instantly as well), which is about butches/studs in the NYC drag ball scene. They use the term "aggressive" or "aggressive women" to describe themselves and it just is beginning to bother me. It's not that I don't love all the eye candy dyke culture, especially a peek into one I'm not directly familiar with, but jesus do they have to keep saying "to be aggressive you have to do *insert butch thing here*"? Honestly, I consider myself to be very aggressive and I'm very, very femme. To me, to assume that butch=aggressive is to imply that femme=passive and that's just not on. At.all.

I wanted to rather think of the word "aggressive" as just a title that didn't really mean anything, but when it's constantly used as a descriptor (ie: just as "butch" can describe a dyke, apparently "aggressive" can as well and this is synonymous with "masculinity") it gets kind of hard to ignore. I know I shouldn't take things so personally, but seriously, I worked hard to cultivate my aggressive nature, dammit, and I don't want to have to start wearing over-sized jeans in order to make it stick!

As much as I love the NYC drag ball scene, I truly hope this particular aspect of it *stays there* and doesn't spread, because seriously, if someone in the Bay Area who wants to befriend, sleep with, or date me describes themselves as "aggressive" I'm going to take them to task on it and ask them what, exactly, that makes me. And if they have an intelligent answer that makes me happy, I'll probably totally still go to coffee with them and/or take them to bed. And if not, well, it might end with a stiletto to the head.

So, what is you all's opinions of this term? I'm truly curious because, of course, I come from outside this culture (the NYC drag ball culture, I should say, most of the people in this documentary are Black and I am inside that particular culture) and I am looking in, but... yeah. I don't like what it implies about the "other half" of butch/femme culture.

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Body Heat: queer femme porn tour -- sneak preview shows in San Francisco this Friday and Saturday! [27 Jan 2010|05:27pm]


The Center for Sex and Culture presents

a special SNEAK PREVIEW of BODY HEAT: a femme porn tour -- 2010!

Sizzlin' Fierce Fiery Queer Femme Porn - 2 Nights, 2 Different Shows! ***DO NOT MISS THIS EVENT!!!!!!!***

Friday, January 29 and Saturday, January 30
Cost $10.00 - $15.00 you pick :)
At the Center for Sex & Culture, 1519 Mission Street (between 11th and South Van Ness), San Francisco, CA 94103

Come to the Center for Sex and Culture for the one of these barely-legal Bay Area performances of the Body Heat: Femme Porn Tour. Each night will offer up decadent performances/readings by fierce local queer femme writers, performers and devastritixes!

These will be your only chances to catch Body Heat during this spring!
But wait -- two different shows? Who's performing? How can I get there?Collapse )

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PDX: femme picnic! it's tomorrow! see you there? [19 Jun 2009|01:52pm]

queer femme pride picnic
(allies welcome & encouraged to attend)

saturday june 20, 2009
grant park (aka romona park) LOOK FOR THE BALLOONS
ne 33rd ave & us grant place -- off trimet lines: 73, 9, 33
this park is accessible (incld bathrooms) more info here: http://www.portlandonline.com/parks/finder/index.cfm?PropertyID=167&action=ViewPark

Read more...Collapse )
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<3 queer femme pride picnic <3 please repost! [02 Jun 2009|09:58pm]

queer femme pride picnic
(allies welcome & encouraged to attend)

saturday june 20, 2009
grant park (aka romona park) LOOK FOR THE BALLOONS
ne 33rd ave & us grant place -- off trimet lines: 73, 9, 33
this park is accessible (incld bathrooms) more info here: http://www.portlandonline.com/parks/finder/index.cfm?PropertyID=167&action=ViewPark

join us for a femme* loving picnic -- let's show our femme love & pride! please bring picnic items to share, blankets, plenty of water, sunblock, a fancy cake (or cupcakes) to participate in the CAKE FIGHT (optional, but really, you don't want to miss out. who doesn't want to toss & eat cake?) please bring music to share or instruments to play. let's have a friendly fun time in the park!

kid friendly. alcohol free (please respect this)

*femme: if this is how you identify. then you are femme. all genders. all everything. we love you. yr great. we respect you. we will not police your identities.

if you have any questions/ideas/complaints/love/etc please contact: amithyst fist: queerfatfemme79@hotmail.com or wyatt riot: fagtastic@gmail.com

please repost! can't wait to share some sunshine & smiles & giggles with you all.

reposted to many places on lj -- if this is not okay please remove. thanks!
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National Prop 8 Protest on November 15! [11 Nov 2008|08:46am]

Hey, all...

I just heard about this. Pass the word on to everyone you know. Cities all across the CA and the US are participating in this protest.

Let's show them that Americans care about equal rights for all!

SF link: http://jointheimpact.wetpaint.com/page/San+Francisco

CA link: http://jointheimpact.wetpaint.com/page/California

Homepage: http://jointheimpact.wetpaint.com/?t=anon
(You can print out fliers here)

See you there. . .
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Happy Coming Out Day! [11 Oct 2008|10:29am]


40% of homeless youth in the United States identify as LGBTQ. This is an epidemic that impacts all of us. For too long the needs of some of our youngest and most vulnerable community members have been ignored. Current homeless youth feel disenfranchised by the gay community, and adults who left home as teens worry about the ramifications of being open about their past. Saturday October 11th is National Coming Out Day. This year we are challenging the LGBTQ community to join the Come Out, Kicked Out movement.
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Come Out, Kicked Out!!! [07 Sep 2008|08:50pm]

Make your own PSA video today!
*if you are in NYC and don't have a video camera let me know and I can help you out!*

40% of homeless youth in the United States identify as LGBTQ. This is an epidemic that impacts all of us. For too long the needs of some of our youngest and most vulnerable community members have been ignored. Current homeless youth feel disenfranchised by the gay community, and adults who left home as teens worry about the ramifications of being open about their past. Saturday October 11th is National Coming Out Day. This year we are challenging the LGBTQ community to join the Come Out, Kicked Out movement.

Read more...Collapse )
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PoMo Freakshow's Traitors without (T)reason Monday July 14th at 8pm!!!!! [14 Jul 2008|12:31am]


Kestryl and Sassafras are a queer couple that, despite their best efforts, pass as straight more often than they like to admit. Perforating privilege and complicating queerness, Traitors without (T)reason explores the betrayal, invisibility, sacrifice, subversion, and loss that are inextricably tied into public passing. Are you with us or are you against us?

Monday, July 14, 2008, at 8:00 p.m.


Appearing as part of HOT! The 17th Annual Celebration of Queer Culture

Dixon Place

258 Bowery, Second Floor, New York, NY

Tickets - $15 general / $12 students and seniors

Tickets available at the door or at dixonplace.org

For more information about 'Traitors without (T)reason' and PoMo Freakshow visit us online at www.pomofreakshow.com
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[04 Jul 2008|05:40am]

I am driving from Toronto to the femme conference in Chicago this August if anyone needs a ride and wants to share gas money. We are leaving on the Thursday and returning later on the Sunday.


email me femmemomma at hotmail dot com
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[16 Jun 2008|01:52pm]

The Gender Public Advocacy Coalition is pleased to announce the release of its 2008 GENIUS Survey in partnership with Ernst & Young. GenderPAC works to ensure that classrooms, communities and workplaces are safe for everyone to learn, grow and succeed.

The Gender Equality National Index for Universities & Schools (GENIUS), GenderPAC’s most recent effort to end discrimination and promote awareness, encourages colleges and universities to recognize the benefits of a GenderSAFE campus - supportive equitable and protective for all students. Choosing to participate in GENUIS sends a strong public statement that bullying or discriminating based on the race, sex or gender of a student, faculty, or staff member is not tolerated at your institution

Fill out the survey at: www.gpac.org/GENIUS2008survey, and make sure that we have data for as many schools as possible. Your voice will help us continue to work towards a safe and welcoming environment for every student
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[19 Dec 2007|07:06pm]

 Hello folks,
I can't remember if I have posted to this community so I wanted to sotp and introduce myself, my name is frankie and I identify as a queer femme, I am in the city where I pay sixty dollars for a haircut and refuse to pay more than ten dollars for a shirt (LONG LIVE the THRIFT STORE) I live in the glorious city that has a homeless person crossing the street and a person in a BMW honking at them to hurry up and cross the street, that sounds like Los Angeles right???  I am an activist and work with anti-war organizations, and focus on issues that effect the queer latino community.  Know anything good going on in Los Angeles or close by keep me posted!  
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hey [16 Dec 2007|03:10pm]

[ mood | curious ]

hello everyone... i thought I would introduce myself.

my name is Tori.... i'm 18.... a college student in RI and im a femme baby dyke of color... lol... quite the long title...

i just joined this community and look forward to making lots of new friends.... :)


2 comments|post comment

Finally!!! [06 Dec 2007|11:26pm]

[ mood | excited ]

Queen Latifah Announces Engagement to Long Term Girlfriend

Though I'm not sure if Queen Latifah personally identifies as a femme, she is definitely one of my femme icons and I am SO HAPPY that she is finally coming out! It's been an open secret for at least a decade that she likes women, but I didn't know she was in a long term reltaionship and I can't say enough how happy I am to hear about her engagement :) Congratulations Queen!

10 comments|post comment

Mod's in the House [21 Nov 2007|05:04pm]

From now on if anyone posts an fucking rating community you will be banned. No more warnings, no more Ms. Nice Femme. Fuck rating communities and if you post them in here fuck you to. The end.

National Transgender Day of Remembrance 2007 List of the Dead [19 Nov 2007|07:31pm]

I apologize to those who have complained about my lack of lj-cut's. Occasionally, I feel the abuse to ya'll's friends pages warranted. This is one of those times. Other times, I'm just a rude idiot. This is not one of those times. Please forgive me.

Many or most of you probably already know this, but tomorrow, November
20, is the National (in the U.S.) Transgender Day of Remembrance, a day
chosen in remembrance of a transwoman who was killed (Rita Hester) in
order for us all to remember those throughout the year who have been
killed or died because of their gender identity or presentation.

Every year, I post the list of that year's dead, that their names might
be known, where possible, and they might be remembered, even if for
just one day. The Greco-Romans believed that immortality was to be found
in the memory of those still living and this was why they considered a
braggart nature a heroic virtue. Let us thus remember these victims,
who have historically suffered great mutilations in the course of their
murder, as if their killers were trying to erase them from the
photograph of existence.

All the victims from all years past may be found on

After the list of the dead follows the details of the San Jose Day of
Remembbrance which I will be attending. If you live in the area of
Silicon Valley, please come. If not, I beg of you to find out where and
when the nearest remembrance is. Many of the dead were alone when they
died, and many believed they would always be alone even while they
lived. Let not their loneliness continue into the chill after death. Let
them be warmed by the fire of our tears, our thoughts, and our prayers.

Whichever of the alphabet soup you are (LGBTQQIA -- Lesbian, Gay,
Bisexual, Transgender, Questioning, Queer, Intersex, or Ally -- the last
meaning "we invite straight, cisgendered (non-trans) folk too"), please do
this for them.

Lacking a specific formula as yet, I merely call upon the mup gods to
look, read, and remember:
Hermaphroditus, look at the names of the dead.
Ardhanarisvara, read the names of the dead.
Melek Ta'us, remember the names of the dead.
Eris, look at the names of the dead.
Antinous, read the names of the dead.
Hoor-paar-kraat, remember the names of the dead.
Tlazolteotl, look at the names of the dead.
Azathoth, look at the names of the dead.
Pomba-Gira, read the names of the dead.
Inanna, remember the names of the dead.

List of murdered trans people from Nov. 2006 to Nov. 2007.
For more info see:

www.rememberingourd ead.org/day
============ ========= ========= ========= ==
Nakia Ladelle Baker
Location: Nashville, Tennessee
Age: 31 yrs. old
Cause of Death: trauma to the head
Date of Death: January 7, 2007

Hasan Sabeh
Location: Baghdad, Iraq
Age: 34 yrs. old
Cause of death: Stripped and shot dead by an Islamist death squad
Date of death: January 11, 2007

Keittirat Longnawa
Location: Rassada, Thailand
Age: ?
Cause of Death: Beaten by 9 Youths and then they slit her throat
Date of Death: January 31, 2007

Tatiana (Aldomiro Gomes)
Location: Trani, Italy
Age: 57
Cause of Death: Her skull was bashed in, in the middle of the street
Her head was slammed in a car door.
Date of Death: February 18, 2007

Moira Donaire
Location: Viña del Mar, Chile
Age: 30 yrs. Old
Cause of Death: Stabbed 5 times by a street vendor
Date of Death: March 5, 2007

Michelle Carrasco "Chela"
Location: Santiago, Chile
Age: 54 Yrs. Old
Cause of Death: She was found in a pit with her face completely
Date of Death: March 16, 2007

Ruby Rodriguez
Location: San Francisco, California
Age: 27 Yrs. Old
Cause of Death: She had been strangled and was found naked in the
Date of Death: March 16, 2007

Erica Keel
Location: Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Age: 21 Yrs. Old
Cause of Death: A car repeatedly struck her
Date of Death: March 23, 2007

Bret T. Turner
Location: Madison, Wisconsin
Age: 48 Yrs. Old
Cause of Death: Multiple stab wounds
Date of Death: April 2, 2007

Manuela Di Cesare
Location: Pescara, Italy
Age: 37
Cause of Death: Head smashed by unknown object.
Date of Death: April 21, 2007

Unidentified Male Clad in Female Attire
Location: Kingston, Jamaica
Age: ?
Cause of Death: Gunshot wounds to the chest and lower back
Date of Death: July 7, 2007

Victoria Arellano
Location: San Pedro, California
Age: ?
Cause of Death: She was denied necessary medications to treat
HIV-related side effects.
Date of Death: July 20, 2007

Oscar Mosqueda
Location: Daytona Beach, Florida
Age: ?
Cause of Death: Shot to death
Date of Death: July 29, 2007

Stefania (no found second name)
Location: Roma, Italy
Age: 35
Cause of Death: Violently beaten with skull bashed in.
Date of Death: August 1, 2007

Maribelle Reyes
Location: Houston, Texas
Age: ?
Cause of Death: AIDS; Reyes was turned away from several treatment
centers due to her transgender status.
Date of Death: August 30, 2007

Tuesday, November 20, 2007


The DeFrank Center Ballroom
938 The Alameda San Jose CA

The evening will focus on highlighting the substantial progress made in
understanding and protecting transgender people.

Speaking at the event will be Aejaie Sellers, Executive Director of the
Billy DeFrank LGBT Community Center, Danielle Castro of
TransPowerment, Shelly Prevost, Director of the powerful film "Trained in the way of
men", Reverend Sky Anderson of the San Jose Metropolitan Community
Church and Sylvia Guerrero, The mother of Gwen Araujo.

The evening will conclude with a reading of names for those who lost
their lives due to hate crimes this past year.

For more details please go to: www.reelfreedom.com/DOR_info_2007.htm
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femme affinity group pdx presents. . . [19 Aug 2007|08:41pm]

Come join us for food, games and queer summer fun!

Calling all femmes, homos and freaks!
F.A.G PDX invites you to Overlook park for a community picnic.
Swingsets, teeter totters and community building ..oh my!
Bring a potluck item to share and a small grill if you have one.
(there will be vegetarian and non-veg grills)
Group games and gay sheenanigans galore.

This is an all-ages sober event. Yay!

learn more about us here:

*this event is located in portland, oregon*
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[23 May 2007|11:58am]


This is my attempt at introducing myself: I am a 29 year old lesbian (femme) who is working on her masters degree in library science. Museum curator is what that means for me. I have had an LJ account for awhile, but I am really bored with the content I see and am sincerely looking for a few odd balls to play with. Anyway………ask me questions, ask to be added, give me a new song to listen to, tell me to fuck off………

In the nude  is my mantra so sometimes I may post some appropriate, tateful nakedness or a dapple of random  femme verse that may be a bit explicit ……….anyway…….i hope i did not step out of line introducing myself. I think this community is really, really wonderful.

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